Shane does an epic job of using theological reasoning to prove that not only was Goldilocks and Three Bears a true story but it is incontrovertible evidence of a creator. It’s a brilliant piece of reasoning that you obviously can’t argue with (or else you’ll be tortured in hell FOREVER).

It is time to set the record straight, and affirm the historical Truth of the Goldilocks narrative. I intend to show that it is overwhelmingly more likely that the Goldilocks story is literally true than not, and not only does it constitute Warranted True Belief, it is *necessarily* true in a deep ontological and cosmological sense, i.e. if the G3B model was any different, our universe would be deeply inimical to human life, and we would not even be here.

Definitely worth a read: http://answersingenes.blogspot.com/2011/07/on-historicity-of-goldilocks-and-three.html