Archive for February, 2010


“I don’t care if it works on your machine! We are not shipping your machine!”
– Vidiu Platon

“Programming is like sex: one mistake and you’re providing support for a lifetime.”
– Michael Sinz

Real programmers… 0×29

Real Programmers prefer 25Mhz, 128Mb RAM systems. Real Programmers know only Real Programmers can program on such systems. Real Programmers like this.

“You can either have software quality or you can have pointer arithmetic, but you cannot have both at the same time.”
– Bertrand Meyer

Real programmers… 0×28

Real Programmers laugh at simple techniques like these:
mov eax, dword ptr [pIDT+2]
add eax, 8
mov ebx, [eax]
add eax, 16
mov eax, [eax]
and eax, 0ffffh
and ebx, 0ffffh
sub eax, ebx
cmp eax, 10h
jne HackedVector

“Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.”
– Martin Golding

Real programmers… 0×27

Real Programmers have coded a demo against the Ninja Strike Force and won.

“A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history–with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.”
– Mitch Radcliffe

Real programmers… 0×26

Real Programmers quote passages from The Art of Assembly Language Programming every time they frag somebody in Quake.

“It’s OK to figure out murder mysteries, but you shouldn’t need to figure out code. You should be able to read it.”
– Steve McConnell

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